No bruises- No blood, violence might not be “physically visible”, but it still persists. As some studies suggest, when it comes to psychological health, both physical as well as emotional abuse can have ravaging effects on a person, irrespective of their age or gender.
Emotional abuse; includes verbal abuse such as yelling, name-calling, blaming, shaming, or otherwise manipulating the other person. Isolation, intimidation, and controlling behavior are also forms of emotional abuse, which can result in anxiety.
A relationship can be emotionally abusive, if there is a consistent pattern of abusive words or may be, manipulative behavior that wears downs the self-esteem of an individual and undermines their psychological health. Having said that, it’s extremely difficult to identify it, especially when it’s just started to happen.
An individual is subjected to emotional abuse from varied forms of relationships; parents, friends, romantic partners, etc.
The fundamental problem is hard to recognize. Even the victim tends to overlook signs of abuse. At times, the abusers don’t consider it as abuse or anything with connotations . Most of the time is happens in a romantic relationship, especially when we talk about the period of COVID -19; therefore, people around the victim tend to ignore the “red flags”.
All the reasons, why women are more vulnerable to becoming victims. As it won’t cause any physical hardship but might result in increased tension and reduced access to resources.
As there is no legal definition to emotional abuse; consequently there is no definite type in which emotional abuse happens. It could be through gaslighting; an act of undermining another person’s reality, by denying facts, the environment around them or their feelings. For example, trivializing your feelings – “oh, now you are going to feel sorry for yourself”.
How COVID -19 has disproportionately affected the gender?
United Nations Women has referred to this violence against women in the period of COVID-19, as the “shadow pandemic” lurking in the background. A period of lockdown, which was in itself extremely emotionally exhausting, wherein people are struggling to adapt the frequent changes of COVID-19 and are confined in close spaces for longer period of time.
People, especially women, become more prone to such abusive life. Initially, it came across as mood swings, extra loving and caring behaviors, but all the positives tend to erode with a persistent pattern of such behaviors.
Due to restrictions on mobility, it has become even more difficult for people to escape and to miss the signs. Thus, manipulation became a cakewalk. Another prominent way of controlling the partners, specifically women has become easier during the lockdown period; controlling the resources or money, which in turn hampers the financial freedom and prevents the victim from an easy escape.
Therefore, it’s probably not wrong to say that COVID-19 has disproportionate effects on the victims, because even after interpreting a couple of signs, the victim is exposed to the abuser 24/7.
Ways to deal with it:
Foremost thing to help one’s self is to acknowledge the abuse, by doing that one begins to take control of his/ her life once again, and make yourself a priority. And most importantly, stop blaming yourself for something you can even control.
Establish your boundaries, for example, by telling the abuser that they can no longer insult you or to stop name-calling, but at the same time, indulging in an act of argument wont work, therefore disengage when you recognize their patterns and behavior.
Realize that despite your best efforts, you can’t fix the odds alone, because you get used to the toxic patterns of volatility and aggression making it seem normal. Therefore, seek help from professionals and address such issues.
It’s important to give yourself some time to heal. Reaching out to supportive friends and family makes you realize that you are not alone, and the tough times shall pass too.